Okay, so some might say how lame I am for sitting inside on a beautiful autumn afternoon watching a movie but I would say to those people.........back off it's therapy.
Actually, the movie Juno is quite good. For those of you who haven't viewed it, the story line is about a 16-year old droll and witty girl who becomes pregnant and decides to place her child for adoption. I love her character and the movie is both humorous and sad but the best part for me is about her experience and seeing how wonderful adoption is and how amazing the human spirit is. I, of course, cry the entire last 45 minutes of the film and find myself not being able to breath during the last 20. Yes, this is a movie but at the same time it is quite the reality.
Someday I will meet a birth mom who will choose us and who will trust us to be the strongest and most loving parents for her child..........and although confident, she will be sad to let her child go.
Sometimes I have to remind myself that this process isn't only about Pete and I starting a family. It is about a women who is letting her family go. She is making a decision to let someone else raise and care for her baby.
She is giving us the greatest gift, a gift that we can only repay her by making sure this child is loved and cared for every day of its life and for this child to know what a sacrifice his/her mom made by allowing someone else to love and raise it. It's easy for me to know how Pete and I feel about this child but I want her to know how much this child is loved. And how greatful we are for what she has done and how I wish, more than anything, that she finds peace and comfort through this whole process.
Juno is certainly a movie that all can enjoy, not only people engulfed in the adoption/pregnancy process. It's funny, witty and has great music but........... the torturous part is knowing I've sat inside on a beautifully, sunny October afternoon to watch a movie I've seen at least 5 times.
Oh and by the way, this photo is real...you won't find any fake forest backgrounds in my adoption ad pictures.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Telling the world......
We just finished all of the ads for the Little Nickel's in the region and are hoping someone out there reads our ad and wants to meet us. Keep your fingers crossed!!!
Monday, June 8, 2009
Parent Cravings.......
People are funny and what they 'crave' is funny too. Some people crave treats like ice cream and donuts, some people crave traveling and can't wait to buy their next plane ticket. I crave being a parent.
When I was younger, not that I'm old, I would imagine myself as a parent and I would crave these images. The images would be of me making my kids peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (even though I can't stand the smell of peanut butter)because they loved them. These images would be of me waking up at night in the middle of a great dream to change my child's sheets because she had just wet the bed and was standing next to my bed crying. The images would be of me playing with my children in our house on a cold, rainy day though I had a ton of housework to do. Or sometimes they were as simple as driving my child to school and making sure he didn't forget his backpack in the car before I drove away. Sometimes the images would be of me watching my child grow up and laying awake at night wondering if I had done everything in my power to provide this person with a solid sense of self.
What's interesting is that all of the image I had were always about sacrifice and taking care of my child. I know to be a good parent is totally about sacrificing yourself for your child when they are young, but I think kids need their parents to sacrifice all the way from infancy, toddler, teen and into adulthood. Now don't get me wrong, of course you have to let your child become a responsible adult and take care of themself, but parenting never stops and doing things for your children never stops either.
I'm 33 years old and my dad is still doing things for me, like mowing my lawn...only because he wants to do those things for me. He even takes care of my friends who's parents are not around. He always has taken care of my sisters and our friends. I'm sure this is why I always had the images of sacrifice because that is what my parents did for me.
My craving to be a parent is selfish or possibly selfless.......I'm not really sure but I do know I want to 'take care' of my children forever.
When I was younger, not that I'm old, I would imagine myself as a parent and I would crave these images. The images would be of me making my kids peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (even though I can't stand the smell of peanut butter)because they loved them. These images would be of me waking up at night in the middle of a great dream to change my child's sheets because she had just wet the bed and was standing next to my bed crying. The images would be of me playing with my children in our house on a cold, rainy day though I had a ton of housework to do. Or sometimes they were as simple as driving my child to school and making sure he didn't forget his backpack in the car before I drove away. Sometimes the images would be of me watching my child grow up and laying awake at night wondering if I had done everything in my power to provide this person with a solid sense of self.
What's interesting is that all of the image I had were always about sacrifice and taking care of my child. I know to be a good parent is totally about sacrificing yourself for your child when they are young, but I think kids need their parents to sacrifice all the way from infancy, toddler, teen and into adulthood. Now don't get me wrong, of course you have to let your child become a responsible adult and take care of themself, but parenting never stops and doing things for your children never stops either.
I'm 33 years old and my dad is still doing things for me, like mowing my lawn...only because he wants to do those things for me. He even takes care of my friends who's parents are not around. He always has taken care of my sisters and our friends. I'm sure this is why I always had the images of sacrifice because that is what my parents did for me.
My craving to be a parent is selfish or possibly selfless.......I'm not really sure but I do know I want to 'take care' of my children forever.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Patience
If there is one thing I have learned in the past 5+ years of waiting to become a parent it is patience.....I keep telling myself we will be parents soon, hopefully very soon. I have always had a feeling that our child would be born in July.... and maybe it is because in my family, we have a birthday for every month of the year except July. Or maybe it is because July is just 3 months away and I don't want to wait anymore....regardless of the reason, I will be patient and know God will give us the perfect child that we are suppose to love and raise (but maybe He can do it sooner than later) :) Patience.....just a little patience.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
YouTube Video for Birthparents to view
Go to YouTube and type in The Story of Pete and Erin (turn up the volume on your computer)
YouTube Video for Birthparents to view
Go to YouTube and type in The Story of Pete and Erin (turn up the volume on your computer)
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Why we are adopting
We are both in our early 30's and have been happily married for almost 8 years.
About a year after we married, we began discussing when we wanted to start a family. Of course at that time, I though all I would have to do was end my long relationship with birthcontrol and I would automatically, blissfully become pregnant. After a year of trying to conceive, I underwent a procedure called a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG)where the doctor concluded that I had a blocked left fallopian tube (the right fallopian tube was damaged years ago due to excessive scar tissue)and he stated I would have an "outside chance of ever conceiving a child"....more like less than a 10% chance and if I did, it could be extremely difficult and painful for me due to all of the abdominal scar tissue from past surgeries. I took this information and ran with it. I ran all the way to other wonderful and extremely helpful Gynecologist,fertility doctors, specialist, Naturopathic doctors, an acupuncturist, and a dietitian....anyone who would say to me "of course there is a chance you will conceive". And they were right.
On my 31st birthday I underwent my first and only attempt at In Vitro Fertilization (IVF). However, my hormone levels were too low and I miscarried a few weeks later. Pete and I had made the decision before we began the IVF process that we would make two attempts. However, after that first experience I thought long and hard about my being pregnant and how important that aspect of it was for me. I took my doctors advice and decided not to undergo another round of IVF. I had to give up the idea of ever watching my belly grow, or feel the child move inside of me, go through labor pains, breastfeed...all of those wonderful things that come with pregnancy and birth. All I really wanted was to be a parent, I knew that I wanted to be a parent with Pete and I knew that it didn't matter how I became a parent.
My best friend who is a mother of two boys told me that parenting is so much more than giving birth....it is about being there for that child for the rest of its life. It's about diaper blow-outs and wiping snotty noses, it's about laughing at how silly and brilliant your child is, it's about helping him with his homework, it's about watching her roll her mascara covered eyes at you and saying things like "whatever mom...you don't understand." It's about the fact that a child is actually an adult for longer than they are a child. It's a lifetime commitment, not just a 9 month commitment or 18 year commitment.
So after her genius words, many months and many emotional meltdowns along with love and support from family and friends....I said goodbye to my unborn children and began to pray for children that need me as much as I need them.
We began researching adoption before we underwent IVF so it is something we have had plenty of time to research, discuss and focus on. I have a good friend who is adopted, we have friends who have adopted and we have a family member who is adopted, so it wasn't a difficult decision for us to make. Pete and I love each other very much and know we want to be parents....no matter how we become parents.
Pete and I have done so much together in the past 12 years and really enjoy and appreciate our life, but we both agree that having a family has and always will be our main focus. We really want to be parents and we look forward to that day.
About a year after we married, we began discussing when we wanted to start a family. Of course at that time, I though all I would have to do was end my long relationship with birthcontrol and I would automatically, blissfully become pregnant. After a year of trying to conceive, I underwent a procedure called a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG)where the doctor concluded that I had a blocked left fallopian tube (the right fallopian tube was damaged years ago due to excessive scar tissue)and he stated I would have an "outside chance of ever conceiving a child"....more like less than a 10% chance and if I did, it could be extremely difficult and painful for me due to all of the abdominal scar tissue from past surgeries. I took this information and ran with it. I ran all the way to other wonderful and extremely helpful Gynecologist,fertility doctors, specialist, Naturopathic doctors, an acupuncturist, and a dietitian....anyone who would say to me "of course there is a chance you will conceive". And they were right.
On my 31st birthday I underwent my first and only attempt at In Vitro Fertilization (IVF). However, my hormone levels were too low and I miscarried a few weeks later. Pete and I had made the decision before we began the IVF process that we would make two attempts. However, after that first experience I thought long and hard about my being pregnant and how important that aspect of it was for me. I took my doctors advice and decided not to undergo another round of IVF. I had to give up the idea of ever watching my belly grow, or feel the child move inside of me, go through labor pains, breastfeed...all of those wonderful things that come with pregnancy and birth. All I really wanted was to be a parent, I knew that I wanted to be a parent with Pete and I knew that it didn't matter how I became a parent.
My best friend who is a mother of two boys told me that parenting is so much more than giving birth....it is about being there for that child for the rest of its life. It's about diaper blow-outs and wiping snotty noses, it's about laughing at how silly and brilliant your child is, it's about helping him with his homework, it's about watching her roll her mascara covered eyes at you and saying things like "whatever mom...you don't understand." It's about the fact that a child is actually an adult for longer than they are a child. It's a lifetime commitment, not just a 9 month commitment or 18 year commitment.
So after her genius words, many months and many emotional meltdowns along with love and support from family and friends....I said goodbye to my unborn children and began to pray for children that need me as much as I need them.
We began researching adoption before we underwent IVF so it is something we have had plenty of time to research, discuss and focus on. I have a good friend who is adopted, we have friends who have adopted and we have a family member who is adopted, so it wasn't a difficult decision for us to make. Pete and I love each other very much and know we want to be parents....no matter how we become parents.
Pete and I have done so much together in the past 12 years and really enjoy and appreciate our life, but we both agree that having a family has and always will be our main focus. We really want to be parents and we look forward to that day.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Homestudy!!
We are scheduled for our Homestudy on Friday March 27th at 1:00pm. We have completed our letters, photo album, FBI/DSHS checks and physicals. All we have left is the Homestudy.
After so many years of wanting to become parents I am in a bit of shock that we are at this stage.....this is truly the last thing we have control of regarding our future as parents. The rest is up to God, fate, luck...maybe a little bit of all three? Pleaes pray for us, our family and our future birthmother and her child.
After so many years of wanting to become parents I am in a bit of shock that we are at this stage.....this is truly the last thing we have control of regarding our future as parents. The rest is up to God, fate, luck...maybe a little bit of all three? Pleaes pray for us, our family and our future birthmother and her child.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Please feel free to read our letter.
Dear Birth Parents,
It is hard to know exactly how to begin this letter but we want to say thank you so much for taking the time to read it and get to know us. We cannot begin to imagine what you are going through at this time in your life, but we wish you peace, clarity, strength and understanding as you make this most difficult and important decision.
A bit about us: We are both 33 years old and have been happily married for almost 8 years. We have known each other for over 12 years. We met through a mutual friend while Pete was working on the island we now live on. I was immediately impressed with how kind and intelligent he was. Pete says he was impressed by my ability to make people feel comfortable. I remember on the evening that we met I thought to myself, “I am going to have this guy as a friend for the rest of my life.” Little did I know we were already falling in love. We quickly became friends and after three years of dating, Pete proposed while we were on a vacation cruise in Alaska. It was a very romantic proposal, especially because I was extremely seasick the entire evening and when he proposed, he included the words “through sickness and ….sickness.” It made me laugh and I said I would be a fool not to marry him. It was a very memorable proposal….and vacation. We married one year later in September 2001.
We have a very relaxed, respectful and fun relationship and express our love for each other every day. We laugh a lot, talk extensively, and are best friends. We have a ton of fun together and truly enjoy each other’s company. We have been extremely fortunate to have been able to travel to multiple countries together and have driven across the U.S. twice (which I would highly recommend at some point in everyone’s life).
Erin and Pete’s History: We were both raised in smaller communities in Washington State. Erin grew up on an island in Puget Sound with a population of around 5,000 people. Pete grew up in a community in Whatcom County with a population of around 10,000 people. After Erin graduated from high school she traveled to Mexico for a few months then attended college in Seattle. Pete attended college at Western Washington University in Bellingham then transferred to graduate in Seattle. After getting married we decided to live in Bellingham and made that our home for almost 5 years. We so enjoyed living in both Seattle and Bellingham but decided we would like to raise our children in a smaller community. So, when the opportunity arose that we could move back to the island where Erin was raised and has family, we jumped at the opportunity. We now own our own Eco-Tour company which is actively operational in the ‘summer’ season, so we have ample opportunity to spend time with family or relax at home during the ‘off-season’. We were both fortunate to have stay-at-home moms when we were children and Erin is so looking forward to being a stay-at-home mom with our children.
Being raised in the Pacific Northwest it is hard not to love the outdoors. We enjoy kayaking, hiking, skiing, boating, swimming and biking. We also enjoy playing board games, (especially Monopoly and Settlers of Catan), Backgammon, Cribbage, Uno, Wii and the much loved Rock Band I and II. And on some nights we like to veg out to our favorite T.V. shows (Lost, The Office, Survivor, and Erin’s a big fan of any “hospital/medical” show.). We also enjoy reading fiction and non-fiction books and grocery shopping together then cooking huge meals and feeding our family/friends. Sometimes for fun we will get into our car and take, what we call, ‘an island drive’ and turn on one of our favorite music groups (Dave Matthews Band, Coldplay, John Mayer, Nora Jones, Madonna, or any old school Hip-Hop) and laugh, talk, laugh some more and we usually end up stopping somewhere along the way for multiple scoops of ice cream.
We do not have children yet due to infertility issues, but when we do have children, we plan on creating fun experiences with them as well as help them discover their own interests. We plan to teach our children essential life lessons like how to work hard, to take pride in their education, how to be responsible and make good decisions, to enjoy the little things in life like cooking, creating and exploring new ideas and adventures. Most importantly we want them to be happy and will give them encouragement, guidance, stability and love every single day.
We both come from large, loving families. Erin has two older sisters (Auntie Angie and Auntie Charis) and Pete has one older brother (Uncle Kirk) and one younger sister (Auntie Laura). Erin and her sisters are all very close in age while Pete and his siblings are around 5 years apart. Erin was raised in a Christian home with parents who are Pastors and Pete was raised in a Catholic home. Erin’s parents (Grandma and Grandpa) have been married for 38 years and Pete’s parents (Gammy and Gampy) have been married for 40 years this September. We have two nephews and two nieces whom we adore and are extremely close with, multiple aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents, as well as God children and tons of friends with kids. Erin’s parents live 2 miles from us and Pete’s parents as well as his brother Kirk and wife (Auntie Jenny) along with their two kids live about 90 miles from us. Pete’s sister (Laura) and her boyfriend (Uncle Jeff) live about 80 miles from us. We see Pete’s family at least twice a month regardless of the distance and of course we see Erin’s family every day.
Our families are the most important people in our lives which is evident because we choose to vacation with them, spend holidays together, attend their sporting events, theatre plays, spend long weekends together playing games and we like our family so much that we actually live next door to Erin’s sister and her husband and live about a 1 minute drive to Erin’s other sister and her husband along with their two children. We live about 2 minutes from Erin’s best friend and her husband and their two boys. We were lucky enough to attend our nephew, nieces and God children’s births, so we really understand the magnitude of giving birth. These births were extra special for Erin due to her not being able to have children and give birth. One of her nieces was born 3 weeks after she miscarried and one of her Godsons was born 8 months after she miscarried and even though this time in her life was difficult, Erin was so thankful to be a part of those special births as it helped heal her longing to give birth as well as provided the realization of how much she wanted to adopt a child.
Our friends are definitely part of our family and have been so unbelievably supportive in our process and decision to adopt. We are so thankful to have loving, supportive parents as well as family and friends who are so looking forward to welcoming another addition to our family. When we are fortunate enough to adopt a child, that child will be welcomed with open, loving arms by our entire family.
The child we are lucky enough to adopt and parent will always be cherished and loved with all of our hearts. We will make it a priority that our child knows the love, sacrifice and gift you have given to them and to us. After placement, we are happy to continue a relationship with you through letters, photos and are more than willing to explore further levels of openness. Again, thank you for reading our letter and if you have further questions please let us know. We would love to meet you and get to know you better. Our hearts and prayers are with you and we wish you all the best.
With love,
Erin & Pete
Dear Birth Parents,
It is hard to know exactly how to begin this letter but we want to say thank you so much for taking the time to read it and get to know us. We cannot begin to imagine what you are going through at this time in your life, but we wish you peace, clarity, strength and understanding as you make this most difficult and important decision.
A bit about us: We are both 33 years old and have been happily married for almost 8 years. We have known each other for over 12 years. We met through a mutual friend while Pete was working on the island we now live on. I was immediately impressed with how kind and intelligent he was. Pete says he was impressed by my ability to make people feel comfortable. I remember on the evening that we met I thought to myself, “I am going to have this guy as a friend for the rest of my life.” Little did I know we were already falling in love. We quickly became friends and after three years of dating, Pete proposed while we were on a vacation cruise in Alaska. It was a very romantic proposal, especially because I was extremely seasick the entire evening and when he proposed, he included the words “through sickness and ….sickness.” It made me laugh and I said I would be a fool not to marry him. It was a very memorable proposal….and vacation. We married one year later in September 2001.
We have a very relaxed, respectful and fun relationship and express our love for each other every day. We laugh a lot, talk extensively, and are best friends. We have a ton of fun together and truly enjoy each other’s company. We have been extremely fortunate to have been able to travel to multiple countries together and have driven across the U.S. twice (which I would highly recommend at some point in everyone’s life).
Erin and Pete’s History: We were both raised in smaller communities in Washington State. Erin grew up on an island in Puget Sound with a population of around 5,000 people. Pete grew up in a community in Whatcom County with a population of around 10,000 people. After Erin graduated from high school she traveled to Mexico for a few months then attended college in Seattle. Pete attended college at Western Washington University in Bellingham then transferred to graduate in Seattle. After getting married we decided to live in Bellingham and made that our home for almost 5 years. We so enjoyed living in both Seattle and Bellingham but decided we would like to raise our children in a smaller community. So, when the opportunity arose that we could move back to the island where Erin was raised and has family, we jumped at the opportunity. We now own our own Eco-Tour company which is actively operational in the ‘summer’ season, so we have ample opportunity to spend time with family or relax at home during the ‘off-season’. We were both fortunate to have stay-at-home moms when we were children and Erin is so looking forward to being a stay-at-home mom with our children.
Being raised in the Pacific Northwest it is hard not to love the outdoors. We enjoy kayaking, hiking, skiing, boating, swimming and biking. We also enjoy playing board games, (especially Monopoly and Settlers of Catan), Backgammon, Cribbage, Uno, Wii and the much loved Rock Band I and II. And on some nights we like to veg out to our favorite T.V. shows (Lost, The Office, Survivor, and Erin’s a big fan of any “hospital/medical” show.). We also enjoy reading fiction and non-fiction books and grocery shopping together then cooking huge meals and feeding our family/friends. Sometimes for fun we will get into our car and take, what we call, ‘an island drive’ and turn on one of our favorite music groups (Dave Matthews Band, Coldplay, John Mayer, Nora Jones, Madonna, or any old school Hip-Hop) and laugh, talk, laugh some more and we usually end up stopping somewhere along the way for multiple scoops of ice cream.
We do not have children yet due to infertility issues, but when we do have children, we plan on creating fun experiences with them as well as help them discover their own interests. We plan to teach our children essential life lessons like how to work hard, to take pride in their education, how to be responsible and make good decisions, to enjoy the little things in life like cooking, creating and exploring new ideas and adventures. Most importantly we want them to be happy and will give them encouragement, guidance, stability and love every single day.
We both come from large, loving families. Erin has two older sisters (Auntie Angie and Auntie Charis) and Pete has one older brother (Uncle Kirk) and one younger sister (Auntie Laura). Erin and her sisters are all very close in age while Pete and his siblings are around 5 years apart. Erin was raised in a Christian home with parents who are Pastors and Pete was raised in a Catholic home. Erin’s parents (Grandma and Grandpa) have been married for 38 years and Pete’s parents (Gammy and Gampy) have been married for 40 years this September. We have two nephews and two nieces whom we adore and are extremely close with, multiple aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents, as well as God children and tons of friends with kids. Erin’s parents live 2 miles from us and Pete’s parents as well as his brother Kirk and wife (Auntie Jenny) along with their two kids live about 90 miles from us. Pete’s sister (Laura) and her boyfriend (Uncle Jeff) live about 80 miles from us. We see Pete’s family at least twice a month regardless of the distance and of course we see Erin’s family every day.
Our families are the most important people in our lives which is evident because we choose to vacation with them, spend holidays together, attend their sporting events, theatre plays, spend long weekends together playing games and we like our family so much that we actually live next door to Erin’s sister and her husband and live about a 1 minute drive to Erin’s other sister and her husband along with their two children. We live about 2 minutes from Erin’s best friend and her husband and their two boys. We were lucky enough to attend our nephew, nieces and God children’s births, so we really understand the magnitude of giving birth. These births were extra special for Erin due to her not being able to have children and give birth. One of her nieces was born 3 weeks after she miscarried and one of her Godsons was born 8 months after she miscarried and even though this time in her life was difficult, Erin was so thankful to be a part of those special births as it helped heal her longing to give birth as well as provided the realization of how much she wanted to adopt a child.
Our friends are definitely part of our family and have been so unbelievably supportive in our process and decision to adopt. We are so thankful to have loving, supportive parents as well as family and friends who are so looking forward to welcoming another addition to our family. When we are fortunate enough to adopt a child, that child will be welcomed with open, loving arms by our entire family.
The child we are lucky enough to adopt and parent will always be cherished and loved with all of our hearts. We will make it a priority that our child knows the love, sacrifice and gift you have given to them and to us. After placement, we are happy to continue a relationship with you through letters, photos and are more than willing to explore further levels of openness. Again, thank you for reading our letter and if you have further questions please let us know. We would love to meet you and get to know you better. Our hearts and prayers are with you and we wish you all the best.
With love,
Erin & Pete
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Greetings
Welcome to our Adoption Blog site. Thank you for taking the time to read about us and our journey to becoming parents. Enjoy the stories, photos, and additions by our family and friends. Please feel free to contact us if you have questions about adoption, are looking for placement or would just like to know a little more about us.
Enjoy,
~Erin & Pete
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